Every year I dread the arrival of late May and early June. I have perhaps lived here a decade or two too long. May and June are the months when the island tragically loses some of the best and brightest of the youth of the nation. Although I attempt to engender learning in my statistics course, I do not pretend to know either the statistics nor the cause of the tragedies. I only know that hearts will be ripped out of the chests of parents who have lost a child. I know that survivors will live with guilt and “what ifs” for the rest of their lives. For all, there is a loss that can never be returned. A pain that time cannot and will not heal. And no words that anyone can say that comfort those who have been left behind. There may be solace for a brief moment, but then you turn around for some reason expecting him or her to be there, and suddenly you realize they are not and will never again be. There. And the gaping hole reopens. Ten years after. Twenty. Forevermore.
No, I do not know the causes. No, I do not know the solutions. In the absence of causes and solutions, doing nothing is tantamount to accepting the annual injuries and occasional losses. Might I suggest a change in habits. Give flowers. Not money. Give mwarmwars, leis, garlands, blossoms, and balloons. Giving money may lead to bringing flowers to the family later. Better to give flowers now rather than money now and flowers later. End the gifting of money to the graduates. Do not tuck that money into their hands at graduation. Hug them, flower them, balloon them, have a family get together at home. And remind them that they are not done, they have only just begun.